Embarassed? Never.

I'd like to believe that I'm one of those people who doesn't really care what other people think, but lets be real....I care. A lot. Case in point...dinner tonight. 


So Haven and I decided to have a special date tonight and go to the Blue Lemon restaurant for dinner. I say special because it truly was- we are so broke that we probably shouldn't have even eaten McDonald's for dinner. By the time I had changed the girl's diapers, dressed the girls, made the girls bottles, packed the diaper bag, straightened my hair, put some makeup on, changed clothes and waited 5 extra minutes for Haven to put on his shoes and get us out to the car,  I was STARVING. All of us were, including the kids. We stopped at Wendy's and picked up some chicken nuggets because we didn't want to spend our kid's future college tuition money on their overpriced kids' meals have to wait for kid's meals too. After what seems like three years, we have ordered and are finally seated at our table waiting for our food. 


Now, picture this. Sophia is literally taking the little number 12 that we were given and banging it over and over again on the table, as if she were trying to say to the staff, "Hey guy's, could we get a move on before my parent's decide they want to eat US?!" Haven, who is feeding the girls their chicken nuggets, thinks I am unaware that he is sneaking nuggets past me and the girls...right into his mouth. I wanted to be mad about this, but honestly I wanted to eat them too.... and after a bit I realize that even though he says he's eating the nuggets that the girls have dropped onto the floor, he is just reaching down into the bag under the table and eating the good ones. Stay classy. 


After a bit we notice a table caddy corner to ours with a little family. There are three kids, three plates. Two plates are wiped clean, and one plate has what looks like an entire, uneaten, still hot and steaming lemon grilled BLT sandwich. Literally. Not a single bite taken out of it. As soon as I notice it, (and it was hard to miss, strategically placed on the corner of the table to tempt us) I look over at Haven as if to say "don't even think about it..."when I notice the expression on his face. His eyes were as big as my head, his mouth hanging open in disbelief and amazement- looking like he had been in a desert for days and he is seeing a glass of water and a steak. He could have been drooling like one of our kids and it wouldn't have surprised me. I should have known that the first words out of his mouth would be "Do ya' think they're gonna EAT that?" I couldn't help but laugh out loud at my poor hungry caveman husband. Only he would have the audacity to even think it lol. As we sat and waited for our food i noticed him casually looking over every once in a while, probably planning some socially inappropriate way to go and straight up beg for that sandwich. Thankfully, he did nothing. When our food finally came, Haven was done and already picking the scraps off my plate (and the nuggets that really had fallen onto the floor) within 5 minutes. Shocker, I know. When he had eaten everything he could reach and tried all the sodas at the soda machine,  he just sat and stared at the table. "I'm still hungry" he says, and nods to the now empty table caddy corner to us. The people have left, but that beautiful, greasy, juicy, untouched sandwich is still sitting there! They didn't even take it with them! Naturally my first thought is "What a waste of food and money". Naturally, Haven's first thought is "Their loss, MY gain!" and he almost stands up to go grab it. 


This is the point I am talking about. The point where you realize you DO actually care what people think. Had we been alone, I would have probably gotten up and grabbed that thing myself. And I would have smiled and maybe even blogged about our lucky find. But we weren't alone and I put myself in other people's shoes. My husband is eating my kid's chicken nuggets, as well as everything that falls out of  my sandwich and onto my plate, and now we are going and getting the left-over food scraps from other diner's tables. In that moment, I was horrified at the level of white-trash-ness we were exhibiting. I started laughing hysterically again and I said "Honey, PLEASE don't do it...oh my goodness this is so embarassing...please don't." If you know Haven, you can picture him saying this. "Well why not?" As a girl comes to clean the table and stack the food, Haven looks on longingly and I try to imagine the moral dilemma going on in his hungry man-head. He eventually looks back at me resolutely and says "I'm going to ask her for it." At this point I want to cry because I know he is not kidding and that my cheeks are red and that i will never want to come back to this place even though the food is really delicious because they will always remember us as the white trash couple who steals leftover food from people's tables. *Sigh*. Thankfully, right as I tell Haven not to, the girl whisks the food away right behind us and the opportunity for complete and utter embarassment is gone. I am relieved. But Haven looks like a kid who waited all year for presents under the Christmas tree but on Christmas morning doesn't get to open them. Utter devastation. 


I guess I do care. Probably too much. As I write this I'm thinking that sandwich would be delicious right now. 


We should have gone to McDonald's.