Poop is private.

If anyone has ever told you this, I'm here to inform you, they LIED. Flat out, straight to your face, lied to you. As a mother of three I can tell you that almost nothing is private. Life in this house very much resembles "big brother".  Everything you do is watched, including what happens in the bathroom.

I'll tell you how it begins. First the urge hits,  so I quickly survey the room and ask myself, "Can I make it there without them seeing me?" and I go into mission impossible mode... gathering Lexie in her bouncy seat, throwing a toy in the opposite direction and yelling for the girls to get it. They start to walk to other way and I make a mad dash for the bathroom, squeezing my cheeks as I run. I get there, get the bouncy seat on the ground, unbutton my pants, peek out the door, and by now they've realized they have been duped! They are fast approaching, I must get the door closed NOW! I turn the lock and hope for the best. There's silence for a moment and I think I've accomplished the impossible. But oh how I'm wrong, the banging and knocking begins, followed by the screaming, and Evie asking repeatedly, "Mommy, ya poopin'?".  After three minutes of not being able to concentrate, I  finally give in, and they rush in like flood water engulfing me.

I now have Lexie in front of me grunting, Evie next to me literally brushing my hair and trying to do my nails and Madie pulling pads, toilet paper, tampons, makeup everything I hold dear out of my cabinets. Have you ever tried to poop during such chaos? It is not easy. Although nothing in motherhood is easy, so why should using the bathroom be any different? Then again, no one ever said it would be easy, just that it would be worth it and for once "they" were right.

Even through the chaos and the crying, nothing in the world in more rewarding then pooping with your kids. You have to remember that they just want to be around Mommy, they want to be just like Mommy and for now Mommy can do no wrong. So I'll enjoy the public pooping and immense amount of diaper changing while I can because 13 years from now when I have a 15, 14, and 13 year old that hate me 80% of the time, I'll look back on their constant shadow behavior and smile, because they love me and I love them. I'm sure one day it'll be me following them and their kids around and it'll be my diapers they're changing.

Muahaha.

It's the Mom life and I wouldn't have it any other way.